My wife and I have been through some stressful times. We’ve experienced the logistical nightmares of a long-distance relationship and the heart-wrenching uncertainties of being an international couple attempting to plan a life together. We met up in New York for a romantic tryst, which resulted in both of us acquiring a now legendary case of food poisoning. We arranged a year-long work visa for her in the States, during which we both worked full-time, shared one car, supported each other through family health crises on both sides and planned our own wedding simultaneously.
Needless to say, our stress levels have known some impressive heights. At times, we were so stressed out we had tearful meltdowns, trouble falling (or staying) asleep, and our skin broke out in pimples unseen since adolescence. However, with my blind, American optimism and my wife’s depressing, German pragmatism, we managed to turn our stress into something we could joke about by personifying it as a little red devil-creature — one which grows fatter the more stress we feed him. At times he has been emaciated, and at times he has been obese, but he will always have the name my wife gave him when I asked, “This stress demon of ours… what should we call him?”
THE WIFE: “Alberto Fummelotz.”
Click here to learn more about the term “Denglish.”
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Oh God, My Wife Is German. 
I know Albert. He owes me 5 bucks.
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Haw! The little bastard…
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Mr. Fummelotz looks a lot like my own personal demon, Mike Can’tdowski.
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Does he? Show us a picture! :)
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My wife and I have a stress devil too. He looks strikingly like my 2 year old son.
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HAW HAW HAW! Nice! Two people with their own children as stress demons!
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I have a stress devil too. He looks strikingly like my 2 year old son.
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Haw haw haw! That is completely awesome. What is it about age 2 man? Is it that they can tear around the house and cause more trouble than before?
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That little Stress Devil would SELL! Can’t you just see him hanging from racks near airport checkout stands, fork at the ready? How about an artfully stacked display in the windows of all those Brookstone Stores that market the most sophisticated-looking useless gadgetry in all the world? Link him to Barnes & Nobel’s exuberant collection of self-help, manage-your-stress, balance-your-life tomes! Without further embellishment, he’s made to order for Halloween! Put a small fleece Santa hat on him, & he’s a Christmas Stocking Stuffer! Write a children’s anger management or “balanced life” book, attach him as the “free” plush toy, and he manages even childhood stresses & strains! I’m tellin’ ya: Little Alberto Fummelotz is a marketing goldmine waiting for pick-axes! And the GERMAN populace might just love him most of all!
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Great fun – and scary – post!
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OMG what a beautiful and lovely name your wife chose :)
I almost ruined my laptop with coffee …. and I can’t stop laughing ….
~Anja~
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Right?? My wife’s brain works on an entirely different wavelength than the rest of us. A really short wavelength, I mean, and German as all hell. :)
How are you today?
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True, our hard headed German brain works differently. Trust me I get to hear that at least once a day ;)
And yes I know German is not easy to learn. One way to practice German is to sing German songs. Do you like to listen to German music?
That reminds me I wanted to look for karaoke songs …..
Schönes Wochenende :)
~Anja~
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So hard headed… and downers! You Germans don’t realize it, but you’re total downers! Of course, we Americans tend to be blind optimists, but hey, at least we’re smiling! :)
As for German music, I did translate Du Hast for all my friends. :) Does that count?
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I know I know and that’s the reason I’m glad to be here :)
Rammstein – I see. Are you able to sing it as well?
As a teenager I wanted to be able to sing the songs of my favorite UK (pop) band ;) It helped my pronunciation of English words for sure.
LG
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I can sing it while playing Rock Band. :)
And I will consider singing some other German songs. My wife keeps trying to teach me a primary school song in German… something about, “Can you hear the earthworm coughing? *cough* *cough* ”
It’s totally for little kids, so it’s perfect for me. :)
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Wow, cool! I’m impressed.
I have to admit I never liked any children songs from back then.
German songs in general were not very popular until the past 15 years. Until then there were only a few, that stood out and remained popular over the years. Marius Müller-Westernhagen; Nena; BAP; Die Toten Hosen; PUR; Söhne Mannheims, Xavier Naidoo; Herbert Grönemeyer; Falco; Die Ärzte; Die Fantastischen Vier; Jan Delay; Die Prinzen … My advice: Find a song you really like and start to practice :)
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Done! And thank you!!
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“Little demon weenie.” Holy crap, that’s funny. You’re killing me. I’m dying. I’m also following you now, because, you know … the funny.
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Thank you!
Please come back often!
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Talk about impotent rage–so glad you popped over to my blog and reminded me you are here. You are hilarious!
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Thank you! And thank you for stopping by again!
Please return often and keep up your great writing!
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Im in a very similar situation, I am in Germany and my partner is in the US. Thats why I wanted to ask how could you arrange that year-long work visa?
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Marie,
Check out the American J-1 work visa:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/J-1_visa
Obtaining one is a serious pain in the ass, but no matter what anyone tells you (especially those God-forsaken immigration attorneys), it is possible and definitely worth a shot. Might as well try.
Come back to our blog and let us know how things go! And GOOD LUCK!
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