Funny (and Stupid) WhatsApp Messages from Germany – Part I

“Oh yeah. Things are about to get weird.” — Image Credit: ( — Subject to CC 2.0 License.

You know WhatsApp Messenger? The instant messenger app for smart phones? My German wife and I have been using it for years. It got us through the long-distance portion of our relationship while I was still living in the States, and now that we’re both here in Germany, it serves as the vehicle through which we convey our high-class dick and fart jokes.

Here is a gallery of screenshots taken from messages exchanged between my German wife and I over the past year. Please click one of the thumbnail images below to start the slideshow:


Although I really don’t like the fact that WhatsApp is now owned by Facebook, I have to award the instant messenger service itself with a grudgingly-deserved 4 out of 5 Merkel Diamonds:

Merkel Diamond from Angela Merkel, Prime Minister of Germany

What about you? Are you a naughty WhatsApp user like us? We’d love to hear from you in the comments section below!


5 thoughts

  1. I use the app all the time. It is my way of planning a great textile shanghi! But yes, it is a good application


  2. Hi! love your site! Just found you after a little encounter with Adam Fletcher’s book “How to be German”.
    So! I’m British, from Tanzania, married to a German and living in France – talk about culture mix ;-)
    I also suffered long distance relationship as my hubby lived in Hamburg and I in Birmingham, UK. We both made a move to Toulouse were we now live. WhatsApp is our middleman, for sure! We used it constantly, its as if we saw each other daily. That and FaceTime ;-)
    Thanks for sharing.
    Until soon,


  3. Absolutely hilarious! If you don’t like using WhatsApp because of the Facebook thing (and because they apparently own all of the photos you send through it or something?), I’d suggest Telegram. It’s a fantastic messaging app with very high encryption and security levels (that’s one of their main concerns as a company) – they even offer $300,000 to anyone who can break their encryption, and no one has won it yet. They don’t own your photos and aren’t owned by Facebook, it’s super customizable and with fun stickers that you can download, is a much prettier app, and is just all around much better. You can also use it from your desktop. I know I sound like a spokesperson for the app but I’m not, I really just love it a lot.


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