As you may already know, my German wife and I have lots of inside jokes, idioms and nicknames for the unpleasant things occurring in everyday life. Here are just a few examples we use regularly:
- The hot, silent gas expelled from one’s anus immediately following a meal of spicy soup, pizza or chili, which smells of poison, horror and all things sullied: “Death Farts“
- Negligent or annoying people — especially teenagers — who are unnecessarily loud and/or obnoxious in public places: “Fuckees“
- The red and inflamed state of my eyelids after I’ve worn a sleeping mask all night long, resulting in the aggravation of my eczema skin condition: “Pig Eyes“
- Frozen food items, generally mini-pizzas and fried hors d’oeuvres, consumed specifically while drinking red wine and watching A Game of Thrones: “Stoner Food“
- A genetically inherited double-chin, which only elongates with age and cannot be destroyed with anything short of heroic plastic surgery: “Yoddler“
- Semi-excited genitalia of the male gender, especially as it is being spun like a pinwheel immediately following a shower: “Half-Schmack“
So back in late September of 2012, as my wife was leaving our apartment in order to buy a few groceries from Netto, she raised one finger and invented an entirely new name for bad breath, complete with pseudo-scientific explanation:
THE WIFE: “Unfortunately, I have the Stink Mouth because the bacterials are sitting on the tongue.”
Ha ha. Stink mouth. That’s perfect!
She’s got a real gift for naming things, huh. :) And it never ends..,
That brings back memories. When I was in the Army and posted to Germany, 1955, I didn’t know any German but I did manage to pick up a girl and on the first date she said “Meine Liebe Gott, du stinkst. Was haben Sie gegessen?” and I thought she was paying me a compliment so I said “vielen Dank”, which was almost my entire vocabulary in German at the time.
Haha, aw, that is adorable :) I used to get into all sorts of trouble in conversations because if I didn’t understand something, I would just say, ‘Ja’.
*giggle* Okay, this was hilarious. Stink Mouth…. pretty good. And so true… LOL
That’s a good one! Could also be the name of a rapper in a parallel universe