As I’ve said before, all of our friends are having babies. The Wife and I are in our early 30s — the real baby-making years — so you can imagine how the infants are dropping all around us like soft pink raindrops. And it isn’t just our friends; it’s friends of friends. Third cousins, casual acquaintances and co-workers… they’re all multiplying like gremlins.
My German wife is still on the fence about the whole ‘having kids’ idea (as am I), so she really notices when someone in her daily life is about to make sperm blossoms. She has all sorts of colorful ways for describing the different stages of human gestation, and I was not at all surprised when she said of her new co-worker:
THE WIFE: “When I first met her, she was highly pregnant.”
Click here to learn more about the term “Denglish.”
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Oh God, My Wife Is German. 
SPERM BLOSSOMS?! That is freaking hysterical. This is why I really read your blog. Gems like that truly make my day. Thanks for that :)
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Awesome! Thank you for the comment, Barbara! We’re always pleased to give someone a laugh. :)
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I think you need a beer…”soft pink raindrops”??!! Lovely, but- hold out! As always, your fan from Minnesota- forever childless, but surrounded by a bazillion nieces, nephews, and now, great-ones!
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Haw haw! Hold out, huh? I’m trying! :)
How have you managed to remain childless? (Oh God I hope it was by choice.)
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Yes, choice and circumstance…but if I told you the story I would have to kill you…hahaha. Anyway, if the spirit moves you two…you will have gorgeous little Denglish people!! :)
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Haw haw haw! Thank you, West. But oh please no. Keep the babies away. :)
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