My wife loves to make guacamole dip, but she always adds an obscene amount of minced garlic to it, for some godforsaken reason. The garlic is so intense it induces acid-reflux in both of us, resulting in the most heinous burps you’ll ever encounter. (I know this because my wife is a disgusting burp aficionado). So after finishing our last batch of guacamole, my wife finally agreed to modify her recipe.
THE WIFE: “We will use less garlic in the guacamole next time, and then we check our burps again.”
Oh God, My Wife Is German. 
I sort of enjoy freaking out my neighborhood German with a German recipe that only East Germans have really heard of, which itself can be made to be quite hot in addition to being traditionally picant: http://ausweis-bitte.blogspot.com/search?q=Soljanka
Take any of the above, and add a pinchie-poo of cayanne peppa whist the soup is a-soupin’. Enjoyen-sie, bitte. It’s even more fun when you point your fingers at them, machine gun style and say “rat-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-tat!”
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I find this funny because I was just considering a post about the German anti-garlic, pro-nutmeg agenda.
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Ooo! Sounds exciting! :)
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