Germans hate travel delays. Hate them. This is because they belong to a culture in which efficiency is prized above all other aspects of society. In Germany, efficiency is king; a cold, unfeeling despot sitting atop a mountain of dead alarm clocks high above the heads of lesser priorities, such as passion, hope or basic human enjoyment of life.
For a German, it’s all about getting from point A to point B, and anything holding up this process is to be regarded with weaponized contempt. Late flights, tardy buses and delayed subway trains drive them absolutely bugshit. And traffic jams? Oh God, traffic jams will rocket their emotional state all the way from Eerily Stoic to Nuclear Wrath.
On an important side note: In German, the letter ‘J’ is pronounced like the English letter ‘Y’ (e.g. ‘John’ becomes ‘Yohn,’ and ‘Jazz’ becomes ‘Yazz.’)
This is why, back in Portland, Oregon, as my wife was attempting to drive west on I-84 during rush hour, she sent me the following photograph and angry text message:
THE WIFE: “I am today in a very bad traffic yam!”
Click here to learn more about the term “Denglish.”
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Oh God, My Wife Is German. 
A bank president was walking through the lobby early one morning before the bank was open, and stopped to find a teller busily counting the cash in his drawer.
“My,” said the executive, “I admire your dedication, young man. ” Where were you educated?”
“Yale,” said the teller.
“Well, that’s fine,” replied the president. I’ll be watching your career with interest. What’s your name?”
Came the reply: “Yim Yohnson.”
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I-84 during rush hour is no picnic, though in summer you could probably manage to have one while waiting… Great post.
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