Denglish 49: The German Evaluates an Ugly American Baby

Ugly Baby with Elephant Stuffed Animal
“KUATO LIVES” – Image courtesy of

Sometime in July of 2011, The Wife and I were enjoying a beer at Crow Bar on North Mississippi. We were sitting near the windows overlooking the sidewalk, when a woman pushing a stroller stopped in front of us. She held a cell phone in her free hand and spoke very loudly into it, in that special way which lets everyone within earshot know she’s kind of a big deal. The baby contained inside the stroller was equally hideous; waving its sticky little meat hooks in the air like a boiled lobster. My wife stared at the baby for a moment, looked up at its mother, then turned to me…

THE WIFE: “Her child looks just like her, which is not a present.”

Click here to learn more about the term “Denglish.”

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For another laugh (and the source of the image above), check out Ugly Baby Alert on Mother Blogger, by Vicki Combden Murphy. And don’t worry — her baby is much cuter now.

12 thoughts

  1. Oh, God! I just might need stitches after this blog (which I seem to be perusing from cover to cover!), and I admire Vicki’s sense of humour, especially after reading her comment above. I thought I’d lose my teeth laughing after seeing your apology in response to one comment, then I saw Vicki’s comment. Now I’m not sure I’d notice if my teeth fell out, anyway, ’cause am too cracked up!


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