What Do You Want on YOUR Tombstone? 10 Famous Last Words, Epitaphs and Gravestones in Germany

“What do you want on your tombstone?”

We Americans all remember those old Tombstone Pizza commercials from the 1990s, but have you actually thought about the epitaph you want engraved on your own headstone? Even if you have no intention of being buried, having a grave, or even a headstone or marker of any sort, it’s still an intriguing concept to leave behind some final, lasting semblance of yourself — literally carved in stone — for everyone, generation after generation, to read and wonder to themselves, “What was that motherfucker thinking?”

Would you go for something loving and sentimental? Or are you more inclined toward the serious and sombre? I, for one, will be shooting for something hilarious. For example:

Robert Clay Allison
1840–1887
“He Never Killed a Man That Did Not Need Killing”

That’s real, by the way; Robert Clay Allison was a gunfighter who racked up an impressive body count before he was killed in a freak wagon accident in 1887. And I must say, morally dubious career choices aside, the man left behind one hell of an epitaph.

Here in Germany, I find myself strolling through graveyards with surprising frequency. (Hey, it’s not my fault they keep building U-Bahn stops right near these things.) I do love gallows humor though, and I think about death and dying way more than I probably should. Still, I have yet to find a German gravestone which really tickles my fancy. So, I just started taking pictures of these dreary things, opening up Photoshop on my computer and slapping my own sentiments right over the top. (And then praying the surviving family members don’t sue my ass for desecrating the final resting places of their loved ones.)

Please click one of the images below to start the slideshow:

Hit us up in the comments section below and let us know what YOU want on YOUR tombstone!

Thank you for reading and have a wonderful day!

— OGM