Let me begin this post by saying I am not a smart man.
Okay, so I was walking my dog this morning when we stumbled into an overgrown field of stinging nettle, known in Germany as, “die Brennnessel.” We’d spent the previous hour navigating a narrow trail — roughly the width of my foot — lined on both sides with this evil shit. My exposed shins had already been brushed a dozen times by a few uppity leaves, and I was sick of being stung by them. Turning around was not an option. So, I switched my camera on and recorded myself attempting to leap over the nettle to a safe, clear, wonderful patch of dirt.
It did not go well.
*** WARNING: Video contains a little bit of swearing. Just a smidge. ***
And here are a few pictures of the aftermath: burning, itching, stinging and swelling — followed by the gradual diminishing of the rash — and me switching back to my “indoor” voice as I continued to swear like a sailor with the clap.
Please click one of the images to start the slideshow:
Doesn’t hurt anymore, but even as I type this — several hours after the incident — my shins still have that pins and needles sensation, like when you sit on the pooper for too long and both your legs fall asleep.
Thank you for reading and have a wonderful day!
— OGM
“like when you sit on the pooper for too long and both your legs fall asleep.” Lol what? I don’t think that’s normal.
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We were walking home from the bar and I had to pee. My German husband let me wander right into a large patch of nettles to relive myself. He thought it was funny as hell. I thought I might die. It was just another example of the German sense of humour.
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That’s fuckin’ mean dude. Bad German!
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He claims that the nettle stings help rheumatism. I don’t have rheumatism! Germans. LOL
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