Let me be clear on something, in case you haven’t already figured this out; my wife and I are disgusting. We openly fart in front of each other then laugh about it, we clean up each other’s vomit and other bodily fluids, and we pinch and pop all manner of nasty skin developments on each other’s skin… just like a couple of chimpanzees grooming one another at the Zoo. On one such occasion in the early days of 2012, while she was pinching an ingrown hair on my leg, my wife stated with frustration…
THE WIFE: “My fingers can’t reach. I need the clapper.”
ME: “You mean tweezers?”
Click here to learn more about the term “Denglish.”
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Oh God, My Wife Is German. 
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