Tag Archives: Expressions

Denglish 17: My German Wife Turns A Smile into Geometry

I make a habit of seducing my wife with honeyed texts and come-hither emails, and I know I’m doing it right when she replies with perplexing German expressions like these:

THE WIFE: “Totally… I’m red like a tomatoe in front of my computer and I am smiling in circles.”

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Denglish 8: My German Wife on Pickles, Canning and Public Displays of Affection (PDA)

My best friend loves to pickle and can things at home. He does it all the time, so when my wife and I are being particularly disgusting in front of him with our public displays of affection (PDA), she warns:

THE WIFE: “It might turn the pickle in his stomach.”

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Denglish 7: A Long Distance Relationship Between A German Woman and An American Man

In the beginning, my wife and I spent many months apart, conducting a long distance relationship between Germany and the United States. We talked on the phone, sent letters and packages in the mail, used email, text messages, Skype and all manner of online chat programs. Still, the distance was hard; a fact my wife pointed out often:

THE WIFE: “We do these months apart and then we come visit us.”

THE WIFE: “I feel like I am high on drugs with missing you!”

THE WIFE: “You know, sweetheart, long distance sucks it up.”

Click here to learn more about the term “Denglish.”

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Denglish 6: The Nightmares of A Young German Student

My wife doesn’t have nightmares very often, but when she does, they tend to be hilarious:

THE WIFE: “Last night I dreamed I was in the middle of a big classroom and I had to give a presentation. All of the people talked and made noise and I for some reason screamed ‘EVERYBODY SHUTS THE FUCK UP!'”

Click here to learn more about the term “Denglish.”

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Denglish 5: How Do You Say ‘Texas Hold ‘Em’ in German?

I’ve played a fair bit of poker in my day — Texas Hold ‘Em, to be specific — and I am familiar with terms like “winning the pot,” “pot odds” and “taking home the pot.” I am not, however, familiar with this adorable gem:

THE WIFE: “Hi honey! How was poker? Did you get a piece of the pot?”

Click here to learn more about the term “Denglish.”

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Denglish 4: How A German Woman Finds Perfect Clarity

In America, we have the expression, “crystal clear.” My wife, however, is not from around here:

THE WIFE: “Yes, I understand it now. It is glass clear.”

Click here to learn more about the term “Denglish.”

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Denglish 3: My German Wife Dispels My Hardcore Bachelor Façade

When my wife and I were first getting to know each other and she began to see through my swingin’ bachelor façade, she once described me thusly:

THE WIFE: “You are hard outside, but… I think you have soft insides.”

Click here to learn more about the term “Denglish.”

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