Oh Berlin, you big silly. Is that a meat-eating flower jutting out from a mural of pure, German madness? “Have fun on your way to school, kids!”
The Wife and I were recently visited by one of our very close friends from Portland, Oregon. We shall call him, “Looney Tunes.” Looney Tunes spent New Year’s with us in Hannover, and then on January 2nd, we all took the CE train to Berlin.
I’d only been to Berlin once before, back in June of 2011, and that trip was wildly different. It was summer and we were staying in Mitte. This time around, it was winter and we were staying in Kreuzberg. Kreuzberg used to be punk rocker central and it was scary as hell, but it is rapidly being gentrified. Walking down the street, the buildings go like this: scary apartment building, crazy graffiti mural, depressing pub, Turkish döner place, Vietnamese restaurant, scary apartment building, really nice coffee shop. It’s kind of jarring how the places with money stick out from the rest, but Kreuzberg does have its own unique charm, I suppose. Looney Tunes absolutely loved it. The Wife and I will stick to our quiet little Hannover for now.
Here are some of the pictures from our trip. We hope you like them!
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- My wife told me that during WWII, the Allied Forces bombed the sweet holy hell out of Germany’s train stations. Like, specifically, in order to cripple their shipping and transport capabilities. Hanging a “Bombardier” sign inside of one is like proudly announcing the name of the last person who kicked your ass. It just isn’t done.
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- To the right is a place I never noticed during our first trip to Berlin. It’s called “Museum Island,” and it is exactly what it sounds like: a bunch of museums surrounded by water. Luckily, it was closed for the evening.
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- That’s the World Clock at Alexanderplatz. I couldn’t read the different times though, because they all seemed to be telling me, “Stop taking pictures, you tool; it’s Beer:30 PM.”
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- There’s the Berlin Christmas Pyramid, inexplicably standing 9 days after Christmas was over. Where’s your efficiency NOW, Germany?
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- That’s the Marienkirche, which I so brilliantly lined up with the TV Tower. Seriously. I thought this picture was going to be AWESOME.
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- In the background is the Berliner Dom. In front of the Dom is a hideous building called — and I’m not kidding — The Humboldt Box. And right in front of the Box? Oh, that’s just the Lustgarten. Really, Berlin? Really??
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- And here is a picture of the Brandenburg Gate, but I like to think of it as “A Picture of a Bunch of People Taking Pictures of the Brandenburg Gate.”
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- Every time I snap a shot of the Brandenburger Tor, I think to myself, “Seriously? Are we seriously going to take ANOTHER picture of this royal bastard? That’s smart; we only have 10,000 already, and the postcards they sell around the corner don’t even have our trademarked Shaky-Hands blur effect.”
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- Here’s the always uplifting WWII Holocaust Memorial. On this latest trip, Looney Tunes discovered there is actually a museum beneath the memorial. Man, I could not WAIT to get down there and cry my eyes out beneath a square city block of concrete and night terrors.
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- This is the bottle of wine our hosts left for us to enjoy. And by enjoy, I mean totally steal and laugh while drinking it.
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- Looney Tunes was all about seeing this place. It’s Berlin’s famous Turkish Market, or Türkenmarkt. I couldn’t see much through the torrential downpour, but I noticed some crazy-looking fruit, fried bread and dozens of little Turkish crones haggling over sheets of cloth.
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- My God the rain was pounding that day. Looney Tunes and I finished looking at the market then shagged-ass to the nearest pub we could find.
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- Oh Kreuzberg, you big silly. Is that a meat-eating flower jutting out from a mural of pure, German madness? “Have fun on your way to school, kids!”
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- Look at that. A really cool painting of a cat… and somebody put glasses on its face and a dick in its mouth. Just the way God intended.
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- These stupid swans looked way cooler at the time I took this picture. Seemed like there were hundreds of them, and each one was bigger than my wife. Now all I’ve got are a bunch of flying jerks in a rainstorm.
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- This is the Warschauer Straße station. The Wife, Looney Tunes and I had to cross it every single day we were in Berlin. You can see why we started calling it “The DDR.”
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- “I love you Berlin! Wait… wait… except for that part right there.”
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- There’s the S-Bahn at the Warschauer Straße station. You see all that scary graffiti beyond it? That’s Friedrichshain. It was occupied by the Russians before the Berlin Wall came down (which comes as absolutely no surprise to me).
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- And here’s the last view of the Warschauer Straße station, or as Looney Tunes called it, “The Death March.”
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We visit Berlin in the summer – thanks for the guided tour!
Nice! For how long?
Flying jerks in a rain storm …
Stupid, ill-tempered swans…
Smite them! Smite them I say.
Ahhh, my Berlin. I wonder how many people now own a picture of you taking a picture of the Brandenburg Gate. Oh, and for your information, the graffiti wasn’t there before the wall came down. Only the dreary, grey, asbestos-roofed structures on the verge of collapsing.
Oh really? The graffiti came after?
Holocaust museum…my eyes are on fire, just at the thought.
I know, right?
I hope your trip to Berlin didn’t end up quite as crazy as mine did!
We insist you tell us all about it. In detail, Glasses. In detail…
I plead the fifth!
Haw haw! Awww….
Bombardier *makes* the S-Bahn trains in Berlin.
(http://www.bombardier.com/en/transportation/products-services/rail-vehicles/commuter-and-regional-trains/single-deck-electric-multiple-units/s-bahn-berlin—germany?docID=0901260d80010277)
“Yes sir, willkommen in Berlin … because first thing in the morning, when I go to work, I needs me my daily dose of irony!”
One day, hopeful in the future, either before or after Flughafen Berlin opens (whenever that may be), Humboldt Box will become once again the Stadtschloss, though in truth, the StadtschloB might actually be a fitting description.
Behind the graffiti in either Friedrichshain, Kreuzberg, Neukölln, (or Kreuz-Kölln) resides a lot of really lovely and warm people … armed with cans of spray-paint. I swear that’s pretty much required for living in a flat in any of these Kiez’es.
Haw haw haw! “… armed with cans of spray-paint.”
Thank you for all the great information, Fotoeins!
Good stuff!
Do you live in Berlin?
Great post, by the way! I was in Berlin for 9 weeks this past October to December. While they were away, a friend was kind enough to let me stay in their place in Schöneberg.
Ah. Got it. Right on.
I hope you had a great time!
It kind of looks like there’s a marshmallow speared on top of the Marienkirche.
Haw haw! Looking at it that way, my picture is way more interesting. :)
Berlin is on my list of cities I want to visit again. Last time I was there was in 1979.
LG Anja
Wow! Really?
It’s time to return, Anja!
Yeah I know.
I was a Teenager at that time and my parents wanted to show me the city. I think I was more scared than able to enjoy the trip. Crossing the DDR and going through Checkpoint Charlie was a nightmare …. long story.
Speaking of Berlin, you maybe interested in this clip:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jlbAUFvh04k&list=PL5CE929944CB2CDB3
LG Anja
Woah! That was awesome! I understood maybe 5 words of it, but it didn’t matter. Very cool. Thank you Anja!
Sorry to have missed you! We live in Kreuzberg — about 3 blocks from the actual Kreuzberg in Viktoria Park, very near Bergmannstr, and around the corner from the most famous currywurst place in the world – Currywurst 36. Give me a heads up next time you come and we can point you in the direction of a great absinthe bar AND just about the only AUTHENTIC Mexican restaurant in Germany (plus a great place to get a real American hamburger — less than 2 blocks from us).
Oh cool! Thank you Jaton! We definitely well!
Did you recognize any of the pictures from near your neighborhood?
Certainly recognized some of the photos, but didn’t notice any that were in our immediate neighborhood. We’re about 4 stops on the U-7 from the Neukoln Rathaus — so near there (and our son used to live there so we spent alot of time there), but didn’t see anything we recognized for sure. There are a zillion Turkish markets – it’s about like saying something is near the Starbucks. Did you go to the one on Maybacher Ufer? That’s one of the largest ones. It’s there on Fridays (and maybe Tuesdays). Here’s a cool piece of grafitti, by the way – http://www.flickr.com/photos/96307955@N00/540560206/ – and ask you can imagine, there’s a whole lot more where that came from – both in terms of the ‘polished’ type like this and the really raw type.
Oh wow! Great find, Jaton’!
I was in Frankfurt at the beginning of last December. I took the ICE train t Berlin for 2 days and also stayed in Kreuzberg. I absolutely loved it, although it was snowy and cold as hell when I was there. Too cold to even go out at night and see the city lit up – and I’m from Canada! You’re pictures brought back some good memories and also gave a different perspective without the snow, Christmas markets and decorations everywhere!
Awesome! It’s always fun to bring back memories of Berlin, right? Oh wait…
:)
Wow, even a Canadian thought it was cold. I’m impressed.
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I like the pictures, even though I can’t stand Berlin… but that’s only me… *sigh*
Haw!
What do you dislike about Berlin most, Raani?
OMG – Where to begin? I think the people… *sigh* They were pretty rude to me…
Dang! Every single person in Berlin was rude to you? :) Just kidn’. Sorry you didn’t have a good time. Maybe we can give Berlin a second chance in the future though!
Pretty much every person in Berlin was rude to me, yes. Including the hotel employees… bad time…
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